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Eat the Yolks is an Amazon Best-Seller! It's brutally honest AND hilarious - click here!
SUPER IMPORTANT: If you’re not familiar with the principles of Paleo/Primal/Real Food Nutrition, you must understand that they are the foundation of any body care routine. My recommendations are meant to build upon the foundations of healthy eating as defined on my “What is Primal/Paleo?” page. No amount of oil cleansing can fix a nutritional deficiency, and nutritional deficiencies set the stage for acne, skin problems, hormonal imbalances, and – yes – stinky pits and bad hair. The quality and sources of our food – the only fuel we have – determines how well every single bodily process works.
I podcasted! Bill and Hayley of Primal Palate had me on for a guest appearance on their podcast, The Food Lovers Dish It…Find it here! (Update: I’m now podcasting on a weekly basis with Diane of Balanced Bites – Find the Balanced Bites Podcast here!)
Update: Since this post was first published, I’ve landed on a pretty perfect duo: a swipe of baking soda over a bit of coconut oil. There are homemade versions and a few for-purchase versions I like. I describe them here.
So I used the title words of this post at the end of my last grueling CrossFit session. And they weren’t in reference to my performance in the workout. In fact, I PR’d my 1RM DL, then did all the double-unders and pistols as Rx’d. And pistols are hard.
For my 2-1/2 readers (Hey Kim, Khloe, and that one younger Kardashian!) I’ll explain the exercise terminology later. It’s not really all that relevant. What’s relevant is – I kind of stink.
Have you ever been in a situation where you’re just so utterly humbled by your total deficiency (whether that deficiency is manifested in your lack of rollerblades, nonexistent cooking ability or, in my case, junkyard stench) that you can’t help but acknowledge what everyone else must be thinking?
So that’s why I wrapped up my gym session today with the Unnecessary News Bulletin of the Day: A sheepish admission of stank.
AndreAnna, who is the official Boss of Me, had the fantastic idea to try and build on the success we’ve both had with the Oil Cleansing Method and experiment with making our own deodorant. (Aside: I can spell pterodactyl, bureaucrat, and aneurysm on the first try but have never ONCE spelled deodorant correctly.)
Most commercial deodorants (got it that time!) contain aluminum and parabens, which are being implicated in certain physiological changes that are correlated with breast cancer based on estrogen manipulation. That’s a fancy way of saying “that $h!t’s wack!” Aside from that, I also don’t have a clue what the remainder of the ingredients on the label are – the same scenario that inspired my awesomely effective “No ‘Poo” regimen. So we picked a relatively simple recipe involving cocoa butter, beeswax, castor oil, tea tree oil, baking soda, arrowroot, and a bit of coconut oil and set to work. AndreAnna’s recipe was modified slightly, so I’m curious to hear her results soon.
Putting it together was relatively easy – I melted the beeswax by placing it in a clean coffee tin submerged in simmering water. Once the beeswax melted, I poured it into a small mason jar and placed it in the hot water to keep it melted while I added the other ingredients. I removed it from the heat and turned my back for a split second…mistake.
Don’t. Turn your back. On baking soda.
Cleanup completed, I poured the mixture into the empty deodorant stick. The plan was to use a vodka toner (brilliant, actually) then apply the deodorant. The toner actually works extremely well – I’ve noticed that I actually stay more odor-free using the vodka alone than when I add the deodorant - which, incidentally, smells like Peppermint Patties due to the tea tree oil and cocoa butter. I think I made the deodorant too beeswax-heavy, so it coats to the point of total insulation and doesn’t allow my lovely pits to breathe.
This was NOT the case a week ago when I Podcasted with my wonderful Primal Palate friends. At the time – and you may hear this on the podcast – I was feeling pretty optimistic about my “stank.” I thought I was registering a consistent, solid “2″ on the Stank Bomb Scale (sorry, impartial jury – aka – CaveHusband).
Bill, Hayley and I even discussed those disgusting, stinky, oblivious folks at Hot Yoga who smell simply awful and are so completely unaware of it. Have I not actually been setting my mat down next to the stinkiest people in my class for the last 2 weeks? Has that ucky odor been coming from…me?
Am I registering the dreaded “5″ on the Stink Bomb Scale?
With all the Crazy involved in the last few weeks – starting school, finishing the nutrition workshop, and generally keeping up with Life – I’ve been terrible about a very key thing: staying hydrated. Over the next few weeks I’m going to see if that makes a difference, because for me it often does. Meanwhile, has anybody else tried making their own DO? I’m not ready to give up yet.
You better help me out with this…otherwise, I’m bringing my Stink Bomb Scale to your house.