BLOG LAW

(If the title of this page reminded you of Bob Loblaw, you win a thousand cool points.)

I love my little corner of the interwebs. And grown-up Me keeps the stuff I love CLEAN.

(This is different from college/teenage/preteen/child/toddler/infant me, who would make sure every conceivable item in my vicinity was either on the floor, under the bed, and definitely nowhere NEAR the hamper or garbage can.)

In my little E-Cave I can use sentence fragments. Comma splices. I may occasionally dangle a participle. I can do and say whatever I please, because when it comes to output, there are no rules.

(Photo from the New Yorker. *sniff)

But I DO get to choose the input, and what comments wiggle through my filter. Thus, I keep my blog clean by following a few rules:

- I don’t approve commenters who are selling Viagra or who need me to send money to the Nigerian Prince.

- I don’t approve commenters who seem unwilling to – or uninterested in – participating in a generally agreeable and respectful exchange.

- I don’t engage in debates that are clearly colored by over-steeping in commercial diet methodologies – the SAD, Weight Watchers, Oprah’s Next Big Fat Diet Failure, AIM (Anything In Moderation), or The Hollywood Cookie Diet. Whatever they told you, they just did it to make money.

- I don’t allow personal attacks.

- I love answering questions; I even relish being corrected, called out, or offered a well-researched alternative view.

BUT…

-I don’t care to debate the efficacy/morality of a Primal diet with angry (or happy, or hungry) “Vegs” of any kind. While I feel it makes sense to nourish oneself with an eye toward the excellent physical and spiritual health enjoyed by “Primitive” and “Non-Westernized” cultures (as thoroughly documented by Weston A. Price), and to extrapolate that “traditional diet” mentality across the scope of several million years of human development, I think the vibrant, thriving, reproducing (infertility epidemic, anyone?) Primal community is proof enough. I’m not trying to prove anybody else wrong. I just enjoy talking about why I am, in general, Right. (Why do you think I got MARRIED? Because being right RULES!)

I also think that the Primal community’s support of sustainable agriculture and biologically appropriate, organic farming is incredibly enlightened, ethical, self-aware and thoughtful. I never truly lived gratefully until I connected with my food in this manner. It surpasses the MIM TV (Meat is Murder Tunnel Vision) and places us squarely where we belong – as both betterĀ stewards of and participators in the brilliantly designed circle of Nature. Regardless, since morality is philosophical and science is physiological, I don’t believe we need to debate. We just won’t connect – on the science or the ethics – and it’s a waste of time. I waste enough time rambling on this blog; thus, I don’t care to blowhard any further.

(Photo from the New Yorker. *double sniff)

Also, I think you’re an evil martian and don’t want you to suck my brains out with a straw.

…Well, I guess I don’t have to worry about THAT. (Hilarious Cannibalism-Veganism joke! Guffaw!)

The point is, I don’t hassle Vegan bloggers because I don’t care. I appreciate Free Will and your right to dislike my way of life, as well as your right to find Perfect Health or Declining Health or Athletic Performance or Self Satisfaction via whichever consumption pattern you choose. I have a right to ignore you, and you can ignore me as well. In fact, I encourage that.

So if you’re being combative, incendiary, or a ButtFace, you won’t get “Approved” here. ‘Cause it’s my blog, and I’m the boss. Suck it.

Oh, and one more Rule: Stop, Drop, and Roll.

19 Responses to BLOG LAW

  1. crossfitcentercity February 16, 2011 at 11:57 am #

    Here here – and thank you for bringing back the word BUTTFACE. :)

  2. Meghan February 16, 2011 at 11:59 am #

    Amen. But…can you have a Hate Comments section? It would probably be amusing.

  3. Elizabeth S February 16, 2011 at 12:09 pm #

    You tell them Cave Girl. And btw I know this nigerian prince who can get great deals on blue pills…. just kidding.

  4. DavidKnudsen February 16, 2011 at 1:42 pm #

    I <3 this blog. Oh, and Meat IS murder; tasty, tasty murder.

  5. CaveGirlEats February 16, 2011 at 2:09 pm #

    I <3 my e-friends :)

  6. Dana February 24, 2011 at 9:06 pm #

    You… rickroll… your blog visitors.

    I think I love you.

    Oh, and one of The Vegan Movement’s favorite lines is “you are what you eat.” Unless they wanna turn into corn stalks or something, maybe they *are* cannibals.

    • CaveGirlEats February 24, 2011 at 10:17 pm #

      You may be the first confirmed Rick Roll so far! Thanks for being a thorough reader :)

  7. Rufus March 2, 2011 at 3:57 pm #

    Thank you for skippin’ on over to my slice of the blogosphere yesterday! That post you commented on took me a LONG time to write partially because I really didn’t want to deal with any ButtFaces :) Reading this page really helped me find a way to state what I wanted to say without (i think) being offensive. So thanks for the help and glad you don’t mind :)

    • CaveGirlEats March 2, 2011 at 4:36 pm #

      I really like what you’ve got going on over there! Keep it up!

  8. babs June 20, 2011 at 3:55 pm #

    I love your rules. I enjoy looking through your site and reading your posts. Keep ‘em coming!

  9. breeanelyse September 9, 2011 at 7:56 pm #

    Amazing. I just stumbled here and I love your blog! Super comical ;)

  10. theheinouscanis October 2, 2011 at 8:37 am #

    Just now got around to reading your blog rules. I wrote a post a while back about how much better I feel and healthier I am while eating paleo/primal consistently. A vegetarian commented that she was “offended by my post.” I can only assume that my revitalized well-being was offensive to her on some philosophical level. Whatever. I choose not to engage with “those” people either. :)

  11. Amanda October 18, 2011 at 4:59 pm #

    Hi! I’m new to the Paleo lifestyle and found your blog. Absolutely love it and I totally agree with your rules!

  12. Ian October 19, 2011 at 8:04 am #

    Love those rules :)

  13. Colline October 20, 2011 at 3:09 pm #

    Just as you respect the way vegans eat, they should respect yours. Good for you :)

  14. Justin February 26, 2012 at 12:18 am #

    Spent the past hour scouring your site. Another great blog to add to the list I check daily. Love your outlook.

    As per your request (- I love answering questions; I even relish being corrected, called out, or offered a well-researched alternative view.) irregardless is not a word. I’m actually only pointing that out because you Rick Rolled me. Crafty, I like it.

  15. Joy July 2, 2012 at 12:28 am #

    [MARKED AS SPAM BY ANTISPAM BEE | Server IP]
    Love the Rickroll!

  16. Sarah December 7, 2012 at 10:59 am #

    I just got rick rolled….By an icon… Double bonus Friday!!!

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